Rule of Thumb #???+1

RULE OF THUMB

Know your enemies.

If you know that your desk at work is your enemy (like I do), get to know it a little better by laying your head down on it and taking a nice, long nap. Your bosses won't mind too much!

Rule of Thumb #???

RULE OF THUMB #???

No matter how tempted you are or how much you've been anticipating a call, do not pull your cell phone out of your pocket while standing over a toilet.

RULE OF THUMB #34

Rule of Thumb #34:

Come in, sit down, and watch. Something interesting most likely will happen.

As I've said before, you never where entertainment is going to come from. I enjoy just looking out of my window at work and watching what happens on the street below. You wouldn't believe how many jokes my co-worker and I have going based on things we've witnessed just four stories below.

RULE OF THUMB #33

Rule of Thumb #33:


I call this the "Hooker" Rule of Thumb...

If she's hot, she's probably a cop!

RULE OF THUMB #32

Rule of Thumb #32

Its not about being lazy, its just about not caring.

This is a derivative of Peter Gibbon's statement "Its not that I'm lazy, its just that I don't care" from Office Space, one of my all-time favorite movies, and lines. Sometimes people get called "lazy" without substance. I know I've been one of those people, but I've never really been lazy, its just that I don't really care about what I was supposed to be doing.

RULE OF THUMB #31

Rule of Thumb #31

If it helps you get some booty, then its not really lying. Right?

After all, that's what its really all about!

RULE OF THUMB #30

Rule of Thumb #30

Its always better to be pissed off, than pissed on.

Believe me, I've been in both positions. I've actually almost quit a job, twice due to someone being a complete bastard and forgetting where the men's room is.